Trouble writing

I know this isn't the first time I've talked about this, and I certainly know it won't be the last, but lately I've been finding myself struggling with even wanting to write, much less coming up with anything to write. Maybe it's because I wrote a novel last month and I'm feeling drained, or maybe it's just because I've been so tired lately due to my inefficiency with adjusting to my work schedule, but I've simply found myself spending much more time than usual without any idea of what to write. And even when I do manage to think of something that I want to write, I have been dissatisfied with what's come out of it.

Personally, I think yesterday was a good example of that. I thoroughly enjoyed the idea of taking grinding in video games (something that I do very heavily) and creating a villain out of it. Twisting a person's mind and making them insane to the point where they believe experience and levels to be real, and that mass murder is the path towards unstoppable power. It might even be a better reason for a villain to want to kill people rather than control them, which is so often a problem glossed over in stories. Even showing what could be seen as a reward for doing so, which could make a hero question whether it is something that they will have to do if they want to stop the villain, and in turn if it would affect their own mental process.

But perhaps that's an idea that is simply too real to make work in a fictional setting. It doesn't make much sense for someone to think about grinding in a world where that concept doesn't even exist. An outsider looking in could get it, but what about the characters in the story? They would have to have some sort of role playing game - one with experience and levels and stat distributions - in which case you have to wonder if the people who play those kinds of games are viewed differently, or have the potential to be powerful in a real fight.

You could try and change the setting of it to be more modern, but leveling up with guns doesn't quite work the same way. After all, it's not really about an individuals power in that case, but the power of the gun. The only thing the user has to be able to do is aim it and resist the kickback, none of which requires a living target.

And perhaps this is all my problem. Perhaps lately I have been trying to tackle stories and problems that are too big to be handled in such small bursts. I've been thinking of these posts as a part of something bigger, and maybe that's why I'm struggling. Not that I hadn't been doing that before, but there were pieces I had written that I didn't plan on taking any farther. But now, even if it is subconscious, perhaps I am simply thinking of these small selections as parts of something bigger - something bigger that never comes.

I don't know quite how to go about resolving this. Mostly because I'm not entirely sure where to begin. But I will say this:

I found while writing this that I rather enjoyed explaining what I was thinking while writing a fictional piece. Maybe I should try that more often.