Hitting on

Michael was in the midst of a conversation with his friends at the bar, jovially drinking and chatting away, when he heard the distinct click and creak of the door swinging wide open. He was an observant fellow, and frequently looked to see what was causing a noise that caught his attention without missing a beat in the flow of conversation with his friends. But when he looked toward the door, beer already raised to his lips, he froze in his tracks. The woman walking in was the most beautiful dame he had ever laid eyes on, and he knew in an instant that he had to have her.

He had been single for years, and half the reason his friends so frequently took him out to drink was to try and entice him to hit on the ladies around them, hoping that one of these days he would get lucky. He didn't follow through with their leads very often, and when he did it almost never worked out. But this girl... Just looking at her was like he was already being pulled into everything that he had ever dreamed of.

And it was only a few moments before his friends saw the look in his eyes, and as one grinned mischievously. Before he could even tell them what was on his mind they knew, and were pushing him out of his chair and in her direction, as she strutted her way to the bartender to order a drink. He stumbled forward a few steps, but continued to walk unbidden by his friends, drawn inexplicably towards this woman who had quite literally just walked into his life out of nowhere.

He sat down beside her, hoping that he appeared to have some form of grace with the movement, and the girl turned to look at him, one eyebrow raised, waiting for him to speak, challenging him almost. "I don't really know who you are," he started awkwardly.

"You don't know me," she replied flatly.

He gulped hard and dry, but pushed on. "You don't know me. But I really want to. Know you, I mean. I saw you come in, and I just..."

"You're not very good at this." Her words were harsh and cut like a knife, sending Michael mentally reeling back. "Are you gonna offer me a drink?"

"Y-yes, of course, why don't I-"

"I already ordered."

Michael felt like he was being bullied. And then the words started coming out of his mouth without his say-so. "Where are you from?"

"Excuse me?"

"Are those your mom's eyes?"

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

"What are you doing for the rest of your life?"

She slapped him so hard, Michael fell completely out of his chair and hit the ground face first, breaking his nose. He was not good at this.